Yesterday was spent spinning out of control. My BP, at one point, was 174/120. No wonder I felt like I was dying.
It’s amazing to me today how my mind can turn on me. I am living so far in the future which illuminates fears I didn’t think I had. It’s becoming increasingly difficult to live in today and trust in my HP that things are going to be okay for me, and for my loved one, down the road.
Going to take it easy today and pray, pray, pray.
Going to meditate, meditate, meditate.
Going to talk to others about what’s going on, real or imagined, hoping to take the power out of the fears.
Going to do just what I can today. Hopefully let go, and worry about tomorrow, tomorrow.
First things first. A doctor’s appointment this afternoon to tackle the immediate, life-threatening physiological symptoms. The rest will come after my body is somewhat out of danger, and not adding to my emotional state.
Kind of reminds me of earlier days…don’t take a drink, no matter what, and then start the real work of recovery.
Thank you for paying me a 12 Step call.
.JPG)
Julianne
ReplyDeleteRight on with first things first, pray, meditate, before, during and after you're seeing the doc. For me talking it out with my sponsor or another alcoholic always works. Writing also.
Couple of years back I had to go on HBP meds, it was situational, saw the doc the other day, I no longer may need them.
Hang in we're with you.
Jim
Julianne, I hope you feel better. I often read your blog and you write beautifully. I feel like I'm reading a published memoir. You have a wonderful gift and I hope your words continue to reach more and more people.
ReplyDeleteThese are your words to me
ReplyDelete"You're giving your fears a voice which takes the power from them."
Thoughts and prayers to you Julianne
Something or someone brought me here today. Another whisper in my heart and mind. MC would say breathe deeply, put on some music that makes you want to sing and then go for it. I tend to sing Xmas music in the middle of July but right now Amazing Grace is resonating in my head. Listen carefully - I am singing it for you. :)
ReplyDeleteMy daughter and I have phone hugs. We count to 3 and then it happens. I feel her arms around me whether she is across town or across the country. Consider this a blog hug :)
Hoping you are finding Peace in the moment.
Always,
Jo
p.s. I also have that BP issue controlled by my mindset. Go figure!